out of curiousity

What in this blog attract u guys the most? I am a boring girl. It's the truth. If u know the real life me.. which, well no one will right.. at least not any body from here. Thats y i enjoy the attention i got here.

But what attract people reading this blog? I am not a good writer, and i have quite a low self esteem. Especially a few incidents that happen. SO far, i have no got no happy ending and i clasify myself as a emo person.

curiosity really can kills a cat isnt it? i have been very curious and it always got me into trouble. The guy i have mention about, the one that said i am ugly, I miss him today. Out of the blue. i miss him. he is really one of the most interesting guy. He got me interested, and makes me think about him. Not so much though, lately.

But today... just a sudden thought... I want him. But well. I Blocked him in msn already and deleted his number. There is no way he could get in touch with me, neither can i. Just to spice out abit, i had an incredible night with him. and it is still so vivid in my mind. i can almost feel it, his touch, his kiss, his breathing. But well, He is a JERK!!!!!!!!!!!

hmm...

well, i have a few consideration about clossing this blog.
As per mention in some of the comment or tag box,this blog indeed bring me a lot of harm.
But no matter what. it is my choice whether to expose myself into these harms (jerks) or not. isnt it?

I agree that i am weak and easily falls into traps. and keeping this blog? definitely give a lots more chances falling into those traps. However, i like this blog. so its a tough choice.

why would i keep this blog?
1. It lets me vent out my emotion
2. I dont need to care how people are looking at me. since they cant really looking at me.
3. I can waste my time in here. Which is safer than wasting my time thinking those unthinkable thought.
4. Its fun to see how people react to my stories.
5. get advices. SOmetimes, a real good advices will pop up. (rare though)

Why should i shut down this blog?
1. Its Harmful. It expose me to weird people and weird guys
2. Its immoral and indecent. Talking about sex life? I even feel guilty having sex without married. I know it sound stupid, but well, i like sex but in the mean time, i feel guilty about it.
3. Lots of input from this blog is actually corrupting my mind.
4. It give me too much explosure to bad guys that only want sex. But they do know how to sweet talk and makes u think its ok to have sex.
5. Too many bad memories~~~

as you guys can see.. the pros and cons are like~~~ well, i dont know~~~

No More

I've been thinking recently, being a lady blogger that talk about this kind of intimacy stuffs is actually a very bad idea right? Although people who are reading this might not know who are you, but still is a bad conduct right? I stay and grow in a very Conservative family. its fun to let so out some times. but seem like recently i have grow older and more mature. I dont really think about sex all the time anymore. But well i still masturbate every now and then.

I found out that during ovulation, my sex drive is really really high. I can feel myself so wet for that period. Few days before and after. Is it weird? I dont know. Seems like i have to be extra careful during this period of time. I dont want to get into trouble by attacking one of my co workers~~~

Maybe due to my job nature, i have to deal with alot of young fine guys. they are nice and cute. tempted me almost every time. Not that they do anything to me, it just that my mind keep playing around with indecent ideas. This is really a bad idea isnt it?

Moreover, with a body like mine, so tainted, dirty and indecent, i really wonder who will want to have a normal relationship with me. I have grown tired all these short term sex life. i wan something that is more feeling. I am greedy, arent i?

Seriously, i think i should stop this blog~~~